Logic of the Yam...

april: hows things?

Me: meh, perty ok I guess

april: good :)

Me: hows you?

april: meh, fine fine myself

get to go tomorrow and get poked and prodded for an allergy scratch test

Me: ewww... fun fun

well heres to hope'n your allergic to yer hubby... err.... NOT allergic... my bad

>.>

<.<

april: LOL

brat

Me: innocent mistake... honest

april: hahahaha, sure sure

even if I was allergic to the hubby it would do you any good :P

meany

Me: me any good... not Directly. but the mental image of him wearing a 'bubble' when around you made me giggle. and laughing is healthy!

I am health food!

april: gigglesnorts strangely i cannot find a hole in that logic

Me: OMG... I just realized im health food!

april: O_O

wha?

Me: I make people laugh all the time!!

by my previous logic Laughing is healthy, thus im healthy....

and people like chewing on me

IM A CARROT!

which explains why I dont eat veggies... I'm not a Cannibal!!

april: LOL... ummm.. in a fucked up way, i guess you are. But I see you as a potato more then a carrot

Me: Yam!

im sweet

april: LOL

there ya go

Me: I am a YAM!

april: Yam Yam is your new name

Me: Yammers?

Yammers in pah'Jammers?

april: Yamtrick?

Me: I could live with Yamtrick

Yat?

april: lol

Lou #1

My Grandmother was the most important person in my life for the first 25+ years of my life.

She was my Security blanket. she was my friend. she was my Grandma...

My mom had me at 16 years old so my grandmother was there for me allot more then your avg grandma.

whenever I was in trouble she bailed me out. when Ron beat me, she would come rescue me. when I needed a Car of my own, she helped me buy it. when I blew up my car, she helped get it fixed. when I needed a place to live and couch surfing wasn't cutting it, she gave me a room.

I can say without a doubt in my mind that no one has ever been there for me to the Degree that she was.

she LOVED my hair. she would run her fingers through it and make comments like "Your hair is so thick", or "I wish I could grow hair like this...". the sad part is ever since I was like 14+ years old my head was either buzzed or shaved bald.

Second to last time I went to see her before she died I had long hair. she asked me if I had grown it out for her and I bold faced lied and said it was. the truth was I just couldn't afford a real hair cut and I was too lazy to Buzz it myself.


I didn't go to her funeral and have yet to go to the Graveyard to see her... Guilt, trouble dealing with the fact that she is gone, and so fourth... But Ive decided in Early August I'm going to go see her. and I'm not touching my hair until I do. and it will be for her.

Reality *paused*

A week ago yesterday a new content patch was put out for WoW. with this patch came a lot of new stuff to do. since Tuesday I haven't had many headaches at all. my mood as been more up-beat and TK has even said and I quote "Your more fun, have you been taking mommies happy pills?"

The Drawback of course to my ADHD to have something to latch onto is I'm not Sleeping like I should(less then 6 hours of sleep a night with no naps). Its harder to tear me away from the game, though IMHO I'm doing better then I used too. oh and im not posting as much obviously.

how long will this last? well I'm already taking dents out of what they added, so its likely that I will be bored with it and in mental and physical pain again by May *nods*

Hypocrisy

Ya, Fuck you for fucking me after I fucked you...

Fuck.


( this Post has nothing to do with you Karen Just FYI...)

Wizards thinks they know...

Cheesy I know...

Games #3

I find it Ironic that ive talked more about magic in the past 2 weeks then I have in a long time and today out of the clear blue I get a Box with 2 30 card decks in it from WotC. one is red one is green.

the box had nothing else in it but two Decks, and it was made out to "Pat Marrs".

did one of my friends and/or Family have it sent to me? was it some promotion were they dug me up to try to drag me back in? was it my wife who swears up and down that it wasnt her... I dont know.

but they cards are neat.

Karen and I are supposed to test them out tonight. she claimed the Green Deck.

Letter to my Family: Diagnosis Part 3

Im a Pathilogical Lier but have improved greatly since Oct 26th 1999, when I told the first person the truth as I know it in detail. but as a side effect alot of my past is "missing" unless I pot ALOT of focus on it, even then I dont trust it or myself. (This is one of the main reasons for this blog.)

I spend most my time wrrying but at the same time im unmotivated to do anything about it. the more im worried and stressed the more my mild headaches become less mild.

I consider myself a very depressed person, and have on Occasion had thoughts of killing myself... most of the time these thoughts dont come by choice.... see the part about daydreams. (Day Terrors)

there is so much more but just the act of writing(and re-writing) this E-mail has worsend my headache and mood.


when I was in grade school every teacher at some point throught the year would ask the same question, what do you want to be when you grow-up. I always answerd the same thing... a Truck Driver. That was untill I re-met my dad. then the only thing I wanted to be was a GREAT Father... Better then my Dad and Ron. The Above is making that very Hard.

Patrick


since I wrote that e-mail, alot has changed, but at the same time alot is still just as bad if not worse.